Wait for It!

I guess this phrase will forever be engraved in our memories....all thank's to the 'awesome' character of Barney Stinson! Even though I completed watching the entire series, this phrase is what I believe tends to bring me back to watching a few episodes now and then....even though how deteriorating and irritating the charactes of Ted, Marshall and Lily have become! Nonetheless....I guess I now realize the concept of 'Wait for it' in reality! Apply it....you may find the same! This note is like a product being released like after months! What's more saddening? It feels like it has been a decade! I may not go into the too explicit detailing of why and how such a feeling ever cropped in my mind, but the point is....I'm back! And I'm loving it! For more than a year....I have been acting strange! I stopped having fun! Kind of like a voluntary action with no reason at all! Starting off with last year, the effect of my 'expectations' from life has been so high....and so contradictory....that I always tended to ignore the current high-points in my life back then! So much so, I didn't even bother to look towards them! The effect's been strange, and sometimes I used to feel as though I really do not know who I am right now! But come to think of it, I guess now I can sit back and laugh at them all! Rather I would prefer learning from those instances! Ever feel like when you want something so badly, it tends to cloud other aspects in life? Well...I'm the live example! My educational ventures were so perfectly plannes out...that the moment one set back hit me, I simply lingered on from them! So much so, that current events like a perfect job, a great place to stay, my inception of the corporate life, the new people I met with...all seemed like average listings on charts! Now I must say that I've been lucky! I got to go back home to my sweetheart and friends and family a little less than 10 times last year! I had the chance to work in a truly awesome unit, in an other wise underestimated global MNC. I did get a core job...and the job timings...too good to describe! But I was unhappy! Unhappy for more than a year! And let me tell you...this did very much affect my own personality, in ways I never could imagine! My happy-go-lucky nature, which in todays hectic world seems a boon, faded! My enjoyment in writing vanished, and a simple note seemed to take hours to develop! So much so, I stopped planning out fun times! The effect was not only psychological! It was physical too! Imagine.....sitting at home....on weekends, holidays....you're too tired (an excuse for being unhappy) to go out....and you gorge on food and drinks simply to pass the time....droop on the couch/bed : the only thing you cane xpect is a massive 12 kg weight gain! And yes, this is my story! People do have times in their lives as to when some event of situation makes you realize the changes in you! For me, getting a chance to live in Singapore served that! After the offer and other technical stuff...I started realizing as to how my approaches may have changes over just the past year! And that was the time, I was shocked to see them! I may have wanted some changes in my life in some directions, but I have been living a pretty decent life till now! Appalling it maybe, but I guess my mentality wasn't just right enough to accept that fact! I did crave for more....but in an non-negotiable manner! I am indeed lucky, to have things fall in place for me, but due to my sheer over-focusing view, I simply missed it! I guess that time, my aim was to skip the present and see whether or not the future may at all have something related to my wishes! Ironically it did! And it took me an international flight trip, a simple excustion around the new campus and some free time in my room to realize the facts! Yes I may have had to bridge a gap between my degrees...but hell, I worked in an well renowned MNC with proper prospects and experience! Yes I may have had to face times of utmost frustrations regarding my educational ventures, but hell I did get an awesome year as a professional! I have had chances to explore myself, my domains and most importantly, I had the chance to be that earning guy for a year! And it did feel awesome, even at times I ended up asking dad for a bail-out! :P But the most important factor I feel is because this 'gap' may have been more for my sweetheart, than for myself! I may have had dreams and aspirations before meeting her, but she accepted me at a time when I was assuming myself to go away to a farther land for a longer time! For a girl like her, how difficult it may have been, I do not know! But I now consider that throughout this one year....we could develop our relationship for times when I'm actually away! The reason for my almost ten trips back home may have been her....but further more...it was for getting her accustomed to the way life treats you....and in the overall...the way we will be dealing with life together! And having had the chance to realize all of this with her, getting to know about separation and distances together....it does feel awesome to know that in some corner of the world...somebody is there whom you can call truly as your own! Consequently, I have made a vow for myself - never to allow situations get the best of me, but the other way round! This was my motto about 2 years back, but I got lost in touch with it over the times! But never again! Truly....never again! I guess now, having written down so may lines...it feels kinda good to be back! So guys....learn from my story as I have learned! You may have plans,...but hell life's does fuck with you! So better than worst, enjoy it and try to make it soothe rather than pinch, as I am doing now! For me, my dream of getting a global culture exposure in the educational domain did get fulfilled......I simply had to wait for it!